A Bajan Good Friday

MANY BARBADIANS are still holding on to the tradition and claims surrounding the most religious day on the Christian calendar – Good Friday. Addinton Forde, research officer at the National Cultural Foundation (NCF), said while some of the older generations still believed in some of the practices surrounding Good Friday, such as not going to the beach and not eating red meat, the younger generation regarded these as only myths. That is probably why several of them will be seen outdoors flying kites and taking a dip in the "forbidden waters". Forde explained that years ago it would have been foolhardy to go to the beach on Good Friday because there was a big suspicion that one might drown or be swept out to sea. He said children were also warned not to run around corners because the Devil was "out" and they would bump into a wall and be hurt. Then there is the famous fustic nut tree. The belief was, and still is for some people, that if you cut this tree on Good Friday it would "bleed" – a sign of Jesus' blood. Kite flying, according to Forde, is also symbolic of the Resurrection while the eggs and bunnies are symbols of new life. One of the traditions which many Barbadians, young and old, still practise is eating fish on Good Friday. There is wide belief that because it is the anniversary of the crucifixion of Christ people should stay away from all red meat. Source: Nation News

Duh! And if you swollow a tam'brin seed a tree with grow in your belly, or if you lash a woman in the sea, she aint gine get pregnant... right? Bare lies dem perpetuating in the name of Christianity. Cut a fustic nut tree and it gine bleed... of course if you don't have such a tree in your yard, you can cut your wrist instead... make sure you slit it vertically and deep for maximum purity and thanksgiving. So that is considered holier than thou, make sure you do it when alone, and rip the phones out the sockets before proceeding, because calling the ambulance during easter is a sin. How many people ever really drowned on a Good Friday? And those who drowned on other days, what was the cause.. Filthy Saturday? Disgusting Thursday? This day in age and people still running from dem shadow... wuh I living in Barbados or Haiti? Next thing we gine be telling we children that if they eat sugar cakes after 9pm at night, 10,000 demons will posess their wicked souls and force them to suck on gooseberries with no salt while plucking out their eyeballs with pitch forks and listening to Barney songs over and over again. Scary.. Barney is just sick man.. i dont even think the demons what to hear that. Wunna gine say how I is a heathen, pagan, backslider and all kinda ting cause i eating lamb this Friday... am i really? So what were YOU when you was cross at Mrs. Jones house increasing your carnal knowledge and flossing hairs from you teet? prick...

*After reading this post, 328 persons will say dem still ain't going to the beach. Yea? Well if yo don't offer up your virgin daughter to me, your house will burn down and your balls will be crushed under a sycamore tree on 4th day of May in the light of a full moon. Great, I'll pick her up tomorrow evening, thanks.