Wondering why son wants to become priest

Dear Christine,
I FEEL THE NEED to share a concern of mine with you and hear what you have to say. The concern has to do with my son who told me a few days ago that he would like to become a priest. Looking back, I realise he has always been a little different (quiet and so on) from my two other sons, but I never realised he had such strong religious feelings.
Now I keep thinking that something profound happened to make him seek the shelter of the church and I wonder if he's doing it for the wrong reasons. Christine, how can I be sure? Source: Nation Dear Christine

Dear naive mother,
There is nothing 'profound' in your son now seeking to be a priest... he is gay. If you remember carefully, you would probably recall that he was quiet only because he was constantly stuffing ripe plantains down his throat, and had a strange grin on his face when you said he might choke on it. You should know by now that the church is the most accepting place for homosexual men... well next to behind the library... but the stockings and hair weave probably itched his skin. There is only one solution for this... you need to beat the crap out of him until the only Box E he talking about is the 5th option on a multiple choice test. As an added precaution, make sure to put pepper in all vaseline around the house. Of course I may be totally wrong, in which case you still need to watch out, since there are an unusual number of gay priest lurking about, so you might need to protect your son. Advise him to be weary, to constantly watch his back.. or somebody else gine watch it fuh he. Consider logging on to eBay and investing in a chasity belt, just in case. Again, I could be wrong.. visit the church, see who he is associating with... but if you see in de Bible that the pages about Soddom and Gomorrah get ripped out... run!

*After reading this post, 78 persons will tell me to leave the priests alone! Yet still 44 of them will then go to the bathroom to choke the bishop. :o.. wuh de bishop do you?